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Friday, September 2, 2011

Comic 946: Randall Draws Cars

Title: Family Decals; alt-text: My decal set has no adults, just a sea of hundreds of the little girl figures closing in around a single cat.

Wow, an almost not-terrible comic. There are no words (major bonus points), the cars look passable, and he uses his traditional stick figure art to excellent effect. From a technical perspective, this is almost the perfect comic.


The point Randall's making is so wrong it makes me want to punch him in the face. Who do you think you're kidding, Randall? Sure, you probably think that you're so smart for picking money instead of kids. "I could have kids, or I could be RICH AND SUCCESSFUL ALL THE TIME." Don't even start that garbage. You're not going to have kids because one, you have no idea how, two, you're a glorified T-shirt salesman who has to jack up prices probably just to support himself, and who flat out can't afford a family, and three, you know (along with everyone else) that you would be an absolutely awful parent.

The "kids cost money" concept is so far from being new or insightful that I want to punch Randall again, just for good measure. Everyone knows kids cost money. They also cry, keep you up at night, ruin everything that's not welded down, and are messy. They're also wonderful little human beings who will someday grow up to be intelligent, contributing members of society (if, you know, you don't suck balls as a parent). They're something you end up loving more than life itself. Kids are a fantastic blessing, and reducing them to a matter of money/not money just makes you a complete dick.

Also, it's worth noting that no one in the forums has any idea what the heck the alt-text refers to. Just Randall being retardedly obscure again.


  1. Do you think he made the rich wife blond on purpose?

  2. Nah, I think that's just how he draws Megan with the colors inverted.

  3. Even assuming Randall really is saying he prefers money over children (I suspect not considering that he seemed to start spending a lot of time thinking about future kiddies around about the time he got engaged), is it necessary to agree with such an intention to enjoy it? Why do you automatically assume that the car with a picture of a pile of money is supposed to be better off? If you believe children are better than money, wouldn't your initial reaction be that the couple's apparent decision to eschew parenthood for the sake of riches makes them empty, laughable people? Isn't that just as funny?

    It is just as funny. The only problem is that it's such an old joke either way that it's hard to find very funny at all, and this particular spin simply doesn't cut the mustard. Especially for us folk who visit xkcd with a predisposition towards dissing it.

    We've all looked at those stickers and thought up funny alternative family setups that could be portrayed. I bet everybody else's ideas are more original and funnier than that one, too. It's a shame we don't all have a popular webcomic to showcase them in.

  4. I'm childfree and even I thought this comic was dumb.

  5. I'm a donating member of both VHEMET and NAMBLA and this comic makes me very angry.

  6. Blond girl not an independent character, just Randall with a wig.

    Someone called it 'tranny Randy' once.

    See, Randy is not capable of developing characters. So all the characters in xkcd reduce to either Randy himself or Megan. Hat guy is who Randy would be without his crushing self doubt (an asshole). When Stick Randall does something so lame even Randy is ashamed, he draws a beret. And when Randy draws stick Randall doing something and then decides he'd like to even out the gender a bit, or when the circumstances of the strip requires a woman, then like the actors in Shakespeare's time, SR dons a wig.

    This comic is yet another "two paths" comic. In the left, he marries Megan, they have kids, and buy a minivan.

    In the right, he marries himself in a wig, goes on Jerry Springer, gets memed onto youtube, and then becomes wealthy as a million teenagers buy his tee-shirts because they think they're ironic.

  7. The blonde girl's name is Sarah. See here. 'Osio Sarah dawado.' means 'My name is Sarah.'

  8. @3:09 She's Trandall or Trandy, not "tranny Randy." You big silly.

  9. wow. you should try looking up the word 'satire' some day.

  10. This is the oddest blog ever...did Randall sleep with your mother and kill your father or something? If not,you are a really sad human being.

    1. I agree. You must be pretty sad people. I think this comic strip is kind of funny and kind of sad at the same time.
      Having dhildren is the No. 1 reason for poverty in the western civilisations and Randall is actually criticising just that! He is being extremely sarcastic - and that IS funny in a way.